Move out of your comfort zone, even when you feel you've failed!

I'm currently sitting on train going from Birmingham to Aberyswyth in Wales for a family wedding. For those of you who know me you know me, you will know that travelling is no big thing to me but today has been something different, we've been delayed at every stop, we've now been travelling over 10 hours and surprise surprise I'm starting to get tired and grumpy.

Of course it's in the midst of these types of days just when your feeling fed up and ready to just say forget it I wanna go home, even though I know the end goal will be worth it. That seems to be the time when God shows up.

So far this trip has produced several ideas for a blog and know doubt I will get round to blogging about them over the next few weeks.

As we've been going through the Welsh countryside (which seems to go on forever, Northern Ireland is so small) I've been looking out talking to God and listening to podcasts. One of the talks I was listening to was about things mens struggle with and how we beat ourselves up when we get "on track" then slip up and fall of the wagon so to speak and feel like you are the worst Christian. Yet God is there waiting in the wings for you to realise he is still God.

As I was listening to the podcast I was was just like God that's me! I do that, you see for the past few months God had given me a few things about my life to share through a blog. Just at that moment God said yes and reminded me of the two things I hadn't blogged about yet had really felt were on my heart.

The first being about a miraculous healing I experienced almost a year ago and the other was about Dads and how I have struggled with the idea of God as a father.

Me being me I was like Yes God suppose I should get around to that when I get a moment. His response looking back now wasn't surprising. I knew deep down in my heart he was telling me to do it now. I had time I was on a train going through the beautiful welsh countryside and there was at least another hour left of the journey, and that was without any more of these delays that had become the norm of the day.

Straight away thoughts were flying through my head, I can't do this on a train, in a public place, what if someone sits beside me and sees what I'm doing, what if they judge me? What if they want to talk? On top of all that when I'm writing a blog I like to walk around, have a pray, listen to God. It was then it hit me, straight in the face as if I had got out of the train and walked in front of it.

Get out of your comfort zone Andrew! 

Just then my phone went and a reply to a text I had sent earlier in the day in response to a request to go to a church and speak, the response simply ended, maybe God is Challenging you, Challenge is good!

God was making a point, and I couldn’t run anywhere.

So I'm here and I'm writing my blog on the train and no joke you would think I'm in a bubble, loads of people walk past but no one wants to sit near me and Gods glory is shinning through the countryside outside.

However all this had got me thinking I preach Christ Crucified, I preach Christ says Go, in my daily job I encourage others to do that, I am all about teaching people to step out of the box and be bold yet here I was struggling to do just that.

Jesus calls us to be radically different, to be the change we want to see in the world and yet I guarantee I am no the only person who finds this difficult? Here I am sitting on a train listening and relating to a podcast talking about people feeling like failures because they’ve missed something God was talking to them about. Yet I know god is clearly talking to me and I’m scared to take that step.

I remember days were if I believed god said it I did it. Yet here I am sitting on a train scared to write a blog about Jesus incase someone sees me or God forbid wants to actually engage me in a conversation about Jesus.

I suppose the point I want to make through this post is this. We all struggle with things, we all know that God is speaking to us but we aren’t always obedient. Does he turn away? No. He’s always there waiting for us.

God knows us better than we know ourselves, I know this blog has been a bit random but it’s something that I really feel challenged to share with you all. Here I am someone who works for God terrified to publicly do something for him on a train incase someone sees.

There is a verse in the Bible in Joshua 1:9 that says: Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go."

So the few things I want you to remember, we all let God down, we all fall short, we all get it wrong sometimes. God is still God and he is still there. He wants us to be strong in our faith to do our best to stand up for him, to be courageous in our faith and break out of the comfort zone. He is with us wherever we go so why should we be afraid or discouraged? If we feel like we have missed something God is telling us to do, Shyed away from doing it because we are worried what others would say or even done things we know we shouldn’t have we need to pick ourselves up and keep going. Recognise our failures but thank God that he is with us through them all.

As a friend of mine said recently sometimes it’s ok to not be ok. God knows that we feel like that better than anyone, that’s why he sent us Jesus!